The Love Of A Father

By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Steven_E_Templin,_II]Steven E Templin, II
"You're going to be a father!" Hearing those words should be the most memorable and happiest moment of a man's life. He should be overwhelmed with so many emotions running through his mind that he just wants to jump and scream for joy at top of his lungs. When I first heard those words it was the most memorable moment of my life, but it was not the happiest time of my life. Words could not express the feelings and the amount of fear I experienced. I had never been so afraid. I pictured my life being a little different, and in a better situation when I became a father. I thought I would be a college graduate, married, with a well paying job, and that the pregnancy would be planned. For me, things did not go as I thought.
On Monday November 16, 2009, my life changed completely. That was the day I found out that I was going to be a father. At the time I was a 20-year-old college student with no idea that I would become a father so young.
In my hometown, Knoxville, TN, it's common to see young parents. A lot of my friends became parents in high school, and some even in middle school. I see how they struggle, and all the difficulties they go through as parents such as stressing over money, having low paying jobs, barely being able to provide for their children, and I knew I didn't want that to be my life. I didn't want to become another statistic or fall into that same category.
A lot of people looked at me differently than my peers and had so many great expectations for me, not only because I was in college, but because I was always involved in something positive and stayed out of the streets. I knew for sure that having a baby before marriage did not fall into those expectations, so when I learned about the pregnancy, I instantly thought that my life was over. I thought it would change my life for the negative. "No more college, no more hanging out with my friends," those were the thoughts that constantly ran through my mind, so the first solution to come to my mind and out of my mouth was an "abortion."
At that time I felt like that was the best thing for me and the mother. We weren't ready for a baby. We were young, immature, and just not ready to be parents.
Then, I remembered the fact that I was not a planned baby either. My parents were a lot older than I was, and were in a much better situation than the mother of my child and I. If my parents had chosen to get an abortion, then I wouldn't be here today. As I began to think more about it I knew that getting an abortion was something I couldn't do. If we had chosen abortion, I knew I couldn't live with myself afterward. I couldn't live with the guilt of killing my child, or with the thought of letting more people down.
I still had to be the man I knew I was regardless of my situation. I believe a real man does not run from his problems, he faces them no matter what the situation. Abortion was then out of the question, and I regret even thinking about it.
I determined I would be the best father I could be, and not just be the type of father that thinks being a dad is sending money every month. I wanted to actually be there for my child, just like my father was there for me.
I feel that having a father in the home is better for a child, and leads to a better lifestyle than those who aren't blessed to have their father in the household. A lot of my childhood friends didn't grow up with their fathers in their home and I see how we are different from each other. Some of them aren't even in school, or are in jail and others are even dead. Some became fathers before me and aren't there for their children just as their fathers weren't there for them.
Cynthia Harper of the University of Pennsylvania and Sara S. McLanahan of Princeton University say, "Young men who grow up in homes without fathers are twice as likely to end up in jail as those who come from traditional two-parent families... those boys whose fathers were absent from the household had double the odds of being incarcerated -- even when other factors such as race, income, parent education and urban residence were held constant." Good fathers make good sons.
My son, Tylen Eric Templin, was born on July 15, 2010. Honestly it was the best day of my life! I thank God everyday for not letting us get that abortion. Tylen is the best thing that has happened to me. I can't even explain the joy I feel every time I look at him. Once I laid eyes on my son it definitely did something to me and affected me in a positive way. It's like nothing else in the world matters except my child. It was then when I truly understood the love that parents have for their children, that unconditional love that words just can't express, only actions.
If I could send one message to men who are either fathers or becoming fathers, it would be this--- be in your child's life. Don't just think being a father is sending that check every month. Be there, and actually spend time with your child. In the world today, children definitely need their fathers in their lives to give them the best chance for love and success, because when the fathers aren't there it affects them in a negative way and they miss out on that fatherly love. "Any man can be a dad, but it takes a special person to be a father." I have pledged my life that I'm going to be that special person, a father.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?The-Love-Of-A-Father&id=6363369] The Love Of A Father