When The Going Gets Tough The Dads Get Going

By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Malik_Amit]Malik Amit
For a long time now, I have felt the need to write about dads and their contribution to the family unit in times of significant challenge. Hardship and challenges are part of life's lot and it is at such times that dads step up to be counted.
Hardship and challenges can come in different guises. Facing the loss of a loved one, going through financial struggle due to job loss and facing life threatening illness is just part of the tapestry of family life. Every struggle has a way of bringing out the best or the worst in the members of the family unit but dads have a unique place in the way the family as a whole faces up to the crisis.
Bear with me for a moment as I attempt to use the example of a captain of a boat. We know that a boat has just the one rudder and therefore can only have one individual steering it at a time. The individual who has control of the steering wheel is the one who decides on the direction the boat will go. It is possible in calm seas for different members of the boat to 'have a go' at the steering wheel but when the storms come, when the winds blow the captain of the boat has to be the steadying hand that guides the boat through the storm and to its destination.
So how does this apply to the family unit?
In times of crisis, the last thing that is needed is for dad to throw in the towel and say 'I cannot go on anymore'. Giving in to despair is a luxury that dads can ill afford. Dads at this point need to dig deep and find the reserves of strength to persevere; to be the calm in the midst of the storm; to be the rock the other members of the family could lean on.
This is by no means easy. Dads are human and need to be able to on the one hand, maintain that solid exterior of a rock and on the other, they need to find an outlet for their own emotion.
There are different ways that dads can do this. From a personal front, I have found that my faith in God has been a huge positive in enabling me to vent my emotions through prayer. Confiding with those members of the extended family who are more experienced is another means of release. Some times dads may not have the luxury of being able to turn to their own parents for support and that is why it is important to develop close relationships with other parents who are more experienced.
It is true that mom and dad need to talk to each other and find strength from one another but I have not included it as a means of venting one's emotion because that is the last thing that you would want to do. At a time when dad needs to be a support to mom and the kids, you would not want dad to use mom as a means of releasing pent-up emotion. This would no doubt have a negative effect.
Dad need to bear in mind that mom is probably just as frazzled if not more than dad. Mom would be looking to dad for support at this stage. It is up to dad to not be found wanting.
Author: Malik Amit
Website Address: http://thatsminedad.com
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